3 Signs You're Getting In Your Own Way

Every new entrepreneur, coach, or practitioner has a different mix of problems that will stop them from growing their business. However, ALL have a core pattern that emerges in the beginning stages of running a new business.
 
90% of new entrepreneurs, coaches, and practitioners struggle with one thing:

Getting in Their Own Way (Mindset)


Fear. Doubt. Hesitation. Financial Pressure. Loneliness. Exhaustion. Worry. Frustration. Uncertainty. Stress. Burnout. Failure. Fear of Judgement.
 
All of these are valid expressions of entrepreneurship. I too experienced these feelings 7 years ago when I decided to go for it and open up a brick and mortar business.
So much excitement, yet equally as much uncertainty.
 
There are a lot of things you don’t know yet and because of that, you feel like you are constantly in survival mode trying to make ends meet. I had to learn a lot of lessons about running a new business the hard way.
 
The biggest lesson I learned was that in business your only competition, they only person you are up against, is yourself.

It’s you against your old self, every single day (especially in the beginning!). 
 

You’re constantly in a battle between your old self, old habits, old beliefs, and your old identity vs. who you want to become, the goals you want to reach, and the purpose you want to fulfill.
 
There are three core problems that keep new businesses in survival mode longer than necessary, that need to be overcome:  

1. Living Too Much Inside Your Head
 
Do you spend too much time overthinking things, which ultimately leads to paralysis by analysis…and nothing ends up getting done?
 
This can leave you feeling like a prisoner of your own mind and it can get the very best of you. Because when you start to live too much inside your head…you start to believe your own bullshit.
 
If you’re anything like me, you can be your own worst critic. The danger is that you can start believing what you think about yourself as fact.
 
You are not your thoughts. 
 
How influential are your thoughts and inner voice to you?  
How is it influencing your decisions, your actions, your ability to run a successful business?
 
You can be your own worst enemy, but it doesn’t have to stay that way. You have to believe in yourself and your ability more than anyone else. You have to pick yourself up when you fall down. You have to talk yourself into a positive outlook when you feel gloomy. You have to find a new perspective and challenge your old beliefs. This all requires new ways of thinking.


Nobody can do that work for you, but you. The best entrepreneurs have an adaptive mindset and can shift (and even challenge) their own perspectives quickly without getting stuck in ‘negative thinking’ feedback loops.
 
How you think is more important than strategy or money. The way you think determines the level of success you will reach (or not reach). You can train yourself to think like a business owner.

Start challenging the way you think. 
 
Challenge yourself to start thinking more…
 
Constructively
Positively
Objectively
Creatively
Like a Victor, not a Victim
Like an investor, not someone who has a job
 
2. Not Trusting Yourself
 
Do you experience self-doubt on the regular?

  • Doubt is the degree of disbelief in oneself.
  • Not trusting yourself is fear based on not feeling good enough.

Two significant dream killers!
 
Want to start trusting yourself more?


Sit with yourself long enough to hear your own truth and your own gut. Then take action on it, without asking others if it’s right or going to work.

 
You’re so much smarter than you think or give yourself credit for.
 
It is easy to fall into information overload when you don’t trust yourself. You seek everyone who has an opinion out for advice on what you should do. You take course after course, hire coach after coach, and all it ends up doing is making you more confused and frustrated. How other people do things isn’t necessarily how you should do things to be successful. You can’t stay tethered to other people’s advice forever. There comes a point you have to take the leap and listen to yourself and trust your own gut. 
 
Do you want to eliminate self-doubt for good? 
 
Stop making excuses for why you don’t have the results you want right now. This sounds harsh, yet it is very liberating to take 100% ownership for why things aren’t working. Mostly the excuses come from failing to do what you wanted to do (or what you said you would do), which leads to not trusting yourself.
 
Excuses are killing your confidence, your success, and your ability to start trusting yourself.
 
Gaining more confidence is a skill and can be learned. Here’s the trick. You have to set yourself up to succeed with small, achievable wins AND doing what you say you will do.
 
Have the courage to face your faults. You will reach success much faster than people who aren’t willing to.
 
When I transitioned to starting my new business, I needed to build in a task that was consistent and was easy for me to succeed. I chose to do this weekly email newsletter that you are reading right now. I knew I could do one email per week and be successful at that consistency level. My confidence grew each week I achieved that goal.
 
What would have happened if I told myself that I was going to write 5 emails per week? I would have failed and found a million excuses as to why I couldn’t do it…killing my confidence and my ability to trust myself.
 
Set small, achievable targets that you are 100% confident you can do. Easy wins build your confidence and you start to trust yourself because you start to prove to yourself that you do what you said you would do, eliminating self-doubt in the process.
 
3. The Need for Instant Gratification
 
Do you just want it to be easy and get better results right now?
 
Entrepreneurship is not a short-game approach. It is a long-game approach. If you don’t have a clear vision for where you are going 5-10 years from now, you will constantly try to feed your need for instant gratification on the road that leads anywhere.
 
It is a marathon, not a sprint. Nothing stays the same, nothing is guaranteed. It takes more time than you think. It takes more adaptation than you think. It takes more resilience than you think to gain traction.

The principles of growing a business don’t change just because you want success now.

 
Are you setting unrealistic expectations for yourself out of the gates?
How long will it take you to grow a skill set needed to reach your goals (like sales or marketing)?
 
Progress is made one step at a time. Every big accomplishment is a series of little accomplishments stacked together over time.
 
You may see other people making it look “easy” and having “instant success”, but that’s not the case. What you don’t see is how many iterations and versions of their product or service they tried before they got it right, how many ‘no thank you’s’ they got, how long it took them to become congruent with themselves and their offerings, or how many different markets they went through before they spoke to the right one.
 
You can’t give up when nobody signs up for your offer, you can’t beat yourself up if you don’t make the sale, you can’t let your dream slip away because something didn’t go your way. A LOT won’t go your way. There are no short-cuts, just a lot of hard work, determination, and persistence behind closed doors that nobody sees.
 

Entrepreneurship is an INSIDE job that constantly tests your resiliency and perseverance.

 
Nobody stumbles into success. You have to keep getting up after you get knocked down, keep your big vision intact when there’s a setback, keep approaching your problems from all sorts of different angles until you find one that works.
 
Success is all about curious experimentation + persistence with the long-game in mind. The purpose is to play the next game better. Turn setbacks into victories. Challenges and setbacks are only valuable if you learn from it.
 
If you have nobody to tell you to keep going. I am here to be the one to tell you to keep going. Step out of your own way because bigger things are destined for you when you do.
 
To your success,
Christine Wilborn